Sometimes It's Cool to Floss, but Did Kim Ruin Her Credit to Get It?

The wealth gap between black and white women is growing to an alarming level. But you wouldn't know it looking at Kim. Who's Kim? Kim is the owner of the high-end Lexus I drove behind the other day. How do I know Kim? I don't. I never met her before and I'll probably never see her again. So how do I know who Kim is? Well, she told me--with her license plate number:

KI2THA M

I never got to see what Kim looked like, but I've lived long enough to recognize the shenanigans of kinfolk when I see them. Such a blatant display of ghetto fabulosity could only come from one race. (Besides, I don't have the energy to fathom the level of wiggerism (or the non-white equivalent) that would motivate a wealthy Caucasian, Asian, or Latina to engage in such nonsense.) So I'll go out on a limb and assume that Kim is black. And since I'm in a generous mood, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she bought the Lexus with money acquired legitimately.

Now, normally when I see a top-of-the-line Lexus, I imagine the driver being a middle-aged, upper middle class, investment-savvy person (of any race) with stock options, a couple of mortgages, and a child or two in a private college. Why did this license plate turn that into someone who either inherited the money, won the lottery, or maxed out her credit card(s) to get the car? Maybe because the same person who'd invest their energy "keeping it real" by brandishing an orthography inspired by 90's hip hop culture wouldn't normally invest the same amount of energy strategically managing their stock portfolio. Or maybe it's because seeing this license plate reminds me of Sheneneh's friend who got her Lexus stolen and sold for parts by her boyfriend. Or maybe it reminds me of the license plate on the car of Justice's boss:
I don't mean to stereotype, but I can't help thinking the kind of person who'd do this would also spend hundreds of dollars a month getting her nails done and her "hair did" and partying her weekends away dropping it like it's hot in da club. The kind that can manage to work her way up the corporate ladder but insist on "keeping it hood," talking loud, giving major attitude, and crying "racism" whenever her unprofessional behavior is questioned. She'd probably fit in really well with the Real Housewives of Atlanta--or even with Frankie and Neffe! I'd like to think Kim is the type of person who'd volunteer as a tutor or a Girl Scout troop leader, but not enough civic-minded celebrities are paraded in the media to herd impressionable people like her onto altruistic paths, so I'll retain my skepticism.

A rapper by the name of E-40 once opined "sometimes it's cool to floss, but don't buy an $85,000 car before you buy a house." Words to live by. Too bad rare gems like this axiom get drowned out by the countless celebrities in videos and on MTV's Cribs who teach the nouveau riche how to blow all their newly acquired wealth on nonsense. So Ms. KI2THA M is only following the example of the PTB's loudest minions: spend all your Benjamins on as much bling bling as you can find. After all, Americans have been force-fed the idea known for decades that you can't take it with you when you die. Right George? Right.

We’ve been socially engineered to believe that we live in a free country,

I’m open-minded enough to hope that we live in

Look, I guess we live in a free country, right? So if an out-of-touch person like Kim wants to use her $60,000 car to advertise her connection to a community that largely couldn't afford said car with a media-fed neologism of a bygone era, well we’ve been entrained to believe that it's her prerogative and she can do what she wants to do. She made that money, we didn't. Right Ted? Right. So I'll just let go and let God for now.

It would be nice, however, if more Kim's of the world could repurpose some of that Lexus money to connect to the community in a more meaningful way, like donating to a school in need or funding a community project. Then maybe we could begin to reverse that widening wealth gap between blacks and whites. Unless of course Kim really did ruin her credit to buy that Lexus and plummeted her net worth back down to the level of most black women. If so, then all I can say is: Kim, you shoulda been smarter with your money. Of course, she'd probably only take such advice if phrased in the style of a 90's hip hop ditty, so I'll quote another lyric from E-40's song (rapped by Too Short):

You don't really know what the game's all about.
It's bout feedin' the family, not freakin' in the Benz.
Instead of rentin', pay for that roof on yo' head
And stop pimpin' in ya own mind knowin' you a trick.
Put ya hustle down playa go and hit you a lick, Biyatch!

Harsh? Hey, I'm just keeping it real. Trust me. Kim would understand. Right Kim? Right.